I’m afraid to post this.

Today, I want to talk about faking it.

Let me start by saying that I have had body issues my whole life. Serious body hate all funneled towards my tummy, my thighs, and any other part that is less than perfect. And before I get a slew of comments saying “but Alia, you are beautiful!!!”, I want to share that it doesn’t matter. At the end, there is always something to criticize, always something to tone, shrink or make better. And I know I am not the only woman to feel this way.

I spent a chunk of my teenage years obese and never really wore a bathing suit. It was always bathing suit + cover up. Always. 

A couple of weeks ago, I found myself on a little slice of paradise. Akin to Lake Tahoe, Pucón is an extreme-adventure town in Southern Chile. We spent our first day at the beach. Just THINKING about it stressed me out. I was going to be there with my man and his family. Chileans all wear bikinis. I only have old-lady one-piece “Miracle suits”.  I was freaking OUT. I’m pretty sure I dedicated at least 10 hours of my precious sister-time trying on/shopping for something MORE flattering, complaining, fretting, & cowering in front of the mirror. I wish I was exaggerating. Ha.

Fast forward to the beach. Playa Blanca. Brilliant blue waters, a snow-covered volcano in the background, and hundreds of women in Bikinis.

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Bathing suit and cover up in hand. I decided ENOUGH. This time I was going to wear JUST my bathing suit. And fake it. Fake it that I have ALWAYS done this. Pretend that I thought my body was PERFECT in my bathing suit. Walk like I FELT gorgeous. And I was going to spend EVERY ounce of my fear and CHANNEL it to that endeavor.
And I did.

Sometimes our fear can ONLY dissipate when we dive into it, head first, with all we’ve got. I straightened my shoulders, lifted my chin, and used my body language to pretend everything I wanted to feel. There’s an EXCELLENT Ted Talk on this (how confidence is AFFECTED by our body language and not the other way around.

So maybe this is one of many major steps to full self-love and crazy hands-down acceptance. And maybe I have long way to go. But this ROCKED. And I will keep on doing it any time that nasty monster of doubt creeps in and tells me I shouldn’t/can’t/won’t. It sure beats the latter.

FAKE IT.

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So! My dear friends. When has this worked for you? What do you think? Please say so in the comments below! I love to hear what you have to say!